Make Your Bed

I once dated a man who said he'd bought a new set of sheets shortly before he met me. He said that he'd hoped that if he made his bed nice, he might find a nice woman in it. Although his penchant for yelling at cab drivers and shaming meat eaters eventually drove us apart,…

Intimacy, or, to Ruffle the Feathers Lovingly

Kevin Kline: To kiss a prostitute, it costs more. Meg Ryan: That makes sense. A kiss is so intimate. You could probably disconnect from everything else, but a kiss... Two people's lips together, their breath, a little bit of their soul. (Stops). All I mean is that a kiss is where the romance is. --French…

hamster, interrupted.

In the winter of 2007 I worked for an eccentric entrepreneur in Brooklyn. He had a window and door business that was faltering while he devoted all his resources to inventing a series of ingredients to create a fireproof elevator. On my first day, his CFO bought me coffee and told me they couldn't afford…

The Inexplicable Things Men Find Attractive

I'm continually surprised by what men find attractive. It's particularly interesting considering how we, as women, tend to focus on trends. As a gender we have a bad habit of assuming that just because some (probably gay) art director thought that gigantic mouths were sexy this year, every man we meet will be looking for that mouth, too.

a bit of Shana and Donny.

"I feel like any conversation I have with any man right now is going to end with him mentioning a girlfriend... or just being a weirdo," I said to my brother on the phone yesterday. "Maybe it's a full moon thing, like that one Archie comic, you remember, when he dressed up in a wig…

fears are supposed to be scary.

Personal beliefs from a spiritual agnostic on a summer Sunday afternoon. 1. Fear is supposed to be scary. Frightening situations are gifts, exactly as valuable as the degree they frighten you. Each is an opportunity to experience liberation, act on faith, release the pretense of control, and find joy. In fact it is that helpless…

another little piece of my heart.

In my eighth grade year, my family drove up the AlCan Highway from Vancouver, BC to Anchorage Alaska, with three cats and the two of us kids in a VW wagon. We moved for a well-paying job that my parents hoped would allow them to save enough to buy a house after years of renting.…

pull it out, shake it out, and hang it out to dry.

I turned on Gladys Knight last night, and in a white China bowl, mixed krab with cilantro, bread crumbs and eggs according to the recipe my mom emailed me that morning. I chopped avocado and tomatoes for a prawn salad. My brother splish-splashed in the bath down the hall. Emerging red-cheeked and damp-haired, he fried…

the easter bunny rides again.

A breeder puts one flat-nosed, bug-eyed Persian cat in the same room with an equally flat-nosed, bug-eyed Persianette; their offspring have no noses and their eyes are popping out of their head. The offspring of freely breeding humans, my cousins and I are all taller and wider than our grandparents (on average. My grandpa is…