We know why men fantasize about the naughty schoolgirl, dominating nurse or coy French maid. There are stories, lore and cliches associated with these roles that have been discussed for so long that even someone who doesn’t spend much time pondering sexuality could easily explain to an alien, “Oh, yeah, a girl in a short pleated skirt and tall socks is hot ‘cuz being repressed by those nuns makes her ca-razy in bed.”
On the other hand I recently asked a girlfriend, “What makes construction workers so sexy?” and she couldn’t tell me, even though she definitely agreed with the sentiment. Women (in this country, anyway) are so used to being drenched in what men find sexually appealing, from strip clubs and porn to the supposedly female-oriented Victoria’s Secret catalog, that we’re well-educated on what a man finds sexy. But we’re not so well-versed in what we find sexy. Or why.
Women have plenty of their own favorite sexual fantasies: the bad boy, the man in uniform, the brooding Celt. I have cherished fantasies starring a college professor or a prospective employer–a man in a suit, in a high rise building. Mm, a job interview that’s actually fun.
But do you know why you find a man in uniform hot? What is it about the tight white t-shirt, stained Carhartts and usually insolent expression on a guy on a construction site that makes a woman do a double-take as she drives by?
Why the bad boy, or the cop?
Of course, discussing why is fun. But it’s also mission-critical as we as a gender become truly sexually liberated. You know why your boyfriend wants to see you in a white latex nurse’s costume. Does he know why you’d like to see him in a leather jacket and boots?
If not, he should. Discussing it could trigger a whole lotta fun in the bedroom.